Sunday Morning Meditation

So the male unit was out at a early meeting and the child was still asleep and I was AWAKE. I have to first give a once over in the family room before I can meditate. Windex the coffee table, fluff the pillows and put away the throws. My next step is to lay out my yoga mat, get my GODpillow, meditation books and candles. Check, check and check. Now I make the tea. Sometimes green sometimes black sometimes herbal. Today was black. I sit, legs crossed and light my candles, three today. With each candle I say aloud a persons name. It has been the same two people for several years now and recently I have added a third. These names are of suffering alcoholics who can not seem to get sobriety. Prayer is the only way I know to help those who don't want help. So I light my candles and think healing thoughts towards each person. Now I sit. Only for a few moments to quiet myself. I read two meditations, sip some tea and sit again. Back straight, shoulders down, palms open and facing up, eyes closed and head pleading to the sky above. I sit.

My husband is home and as he approaches the house he barks. Yes he barks to get a response from our chocolate lab Lincoln. He does not know I am LOVING the silence. He does not even know I am awake. Serenity is shifted and as he enters the house and calls out to see who is up I quickly respond "I am meditating." He quiets himself down and the recentering starts. I sit awhile longer working now on a mantra. Ma-ra-na-tha. Ma-ra-na-tha. My legs become uncomfortable so I go to childs pose arms extended in front. It feels sooo good. The tension in my shoulders is felt and released. I stay in this position for awhile and recite the 7th Step prayer before going into downward dog. I walk the dog. Now back to cross legs and sitting. I am more comfortable now and can be still, at least physically. Mentally my brain swirls. Affirmations begin. I can with God's help. I can with God's help. I can with God's help. More sitting. More praying. More sitting. I wish I could stay here all day. As I come back to my day the list begins in my head. Fold a load of laundry, get a order ready, answer emails, getting ready for E's big 50 at 1:00.

I got some time in this morning. I CHERISH that time because it is so rare. Sobriety has given me a full life. A great life.

I am grateful for those quiet moments. I am grateful for my husbands humor. I am grateful to have spent the day surrounded by sober people and celebrating the life of my sister in law. SO GRATEFUL.....